I’d say run while you still can, but it’s too late for that. Can I interest you in a pamphlet about our lord and saviour LEUCHTTURM Dot Grid notebooks?
Let’s set the scene . . . it’s a cold, grey day in England. So just another day in England. I’m scouring the internet because #Millennial when, almost by divine intervention, a stray article all but falls into my lap*.
*and by “falls into my lap” I mean my friend sent it to me because, and I quote, “this seems like the sort of shit you’d get yourself into”**
**which is not factually incorrect, but I resent the implication anyway.
“How To Identify A Dangerous Cult”
As I read the post, however, I realised something.
I’m pretty sure I’m already in a cult and that cult is called bullet journalling. And if you’re here . . . well, it might already be too late for you. Here’s what I got.
Cult Sign #1 – Charming, Charismatic, “You-Want-To-Be-Them” Leaders
So cult leaders are pretty much all messiahs who seem smarter, more enlightened and better at life than you? I mean, that’s basically a synonym for the perfect Instagram bullet journaller who is super organised and pretty and can draw and do calligraphy.
(No seriously, guys, it’s 2018 – where are these people learning calligraphy?)
Cult Sign #2 – Brainwashing
If you’re confused as to where brainwashing comes into bullet journalling . . . oh, you poor sweet thing. They got you real good. But I have one question for you:
Remember when you could plan your week out without having to draw up 100,000 spread sheets, use a mile of washi tape and colour code your moodtracking emojis? You might not remember the other side anymore . . . but there is one.
Cult Sign #3 – You’re Willing To Invest Loads Of Money Into It – Usually To “Better Yourself”
Don’t even lie to me – don’t lie to yourself. The only way we’re going to get through this is if we’re raw, gritty and honest with each other.
How much do you spend on washi tape, fancy calligraphy pens, rainbow fineliners, “compensating-for-not-being-able-to-draw” stickers and high quality notebooks? (No, seriously though, it’s worth the extra for quality paper or your ink bleeds and- oh dear God, they got to me. Abort mission, I have been compromised.)
Cult Sign #4 – You’re A Recruiter
The last (and most meta) sign that the bu-jo community is basically one big cult?
We’re basically Mormons, telling everyone who will listen how creative and flexible bullet journalling is. How it will change your life; turn you into a #GirlBoss and help you slay those #ProductivityGoals.
That said . . . we’re a great cult. Join us!
We promise not to make you sell your soul. I mean, not until you reach top tier anyway. But it’s fine – most people don’t make it past the levels with the giant lizard gods anyway.
Okay, kids – this was just a quick “kind of bye” post. I’m taking a two week break from content creation/posting so I can just catch up with everyone’s posts, sort out some blog goals etc. and also run an experiment on whether producing more content or doing more marketing is better for your blog growth! So I guess it’s not bye, I’m still going to be lurking around the blogosphere, just not actively posting. Whatever.
I hope you guys enjoyed this post! Are you a part of the bullet journalling cult? Let me know your thoughts down below!